It’s Not About the Nail

Dedicated to husbands everywhere who are trying to love their wives! HT Denny Burk.

Wisdom for Parents with Young Children by Steve McKoy

I love this list by Steve McCoy. We were blessed with some great teaching and followed almost all of these (or tried to follow).  Thankfully there was agreement on these in our church. Though  you cannot point to a chapter and verse of the Bible for many of these, there is great wisdom here.

Believe Kids Are A Blessing
Read The Jesus Storybook Bible To Them
Pray With Your Kids Concerning Taking Risks
Teach *First Time Obedience*
Give Rules For Respectful Disagreement
Give Rules For Respectful Interruption
Give Rules For Being Respectful in Public
The Five Minute Rule (Warning)
Pre-Event Preparation/Conversation
Titles of Respect for Adults
Use Timers
Sharing Is Not Requested, It’s Essential
Boys Treat Girls Differently Than Boys .
Play Rough & Teach Kids To Get Over It
Kids Sit With You In Church
Ask Your Kids To Forgive […]

The Real Effects of an Affair

Hollywood portrays affairs as exciting. God’s word forbids adultery. But Jesus said that he his commands give abundant life. It is the thief that comes to steal, kill, and destroy. Who is right? Though our teens may want to believe Jesus, Hollywood sure makes it sound glamorous. I have argued in my booklet, The Power of Apologetics, that we need to show our children the goodness of Christianity. God’s commands lead to blessing.

This article shows the real effects of breaking God’s commands.

The writer comments:

What you don’t know, or perhaps what you don’t allow yourself to think about, is that your life will become an unbearable mix of yearning and regret because of it. It will be difficult if not impossible to be in any one […]

For Thoughtful Wives by a Thoughtful Wife

Trillia Newbell hits at an area many pastors are afraid to touch, the self-righteous wife. If self-righteousness is a danger for everyone (and it is), then it certainly applies to the area of marriage.

Trillia observes:

After the honeymoon we returned to our home eager to start our new lives together as one. But soon the fairytale ended and real life began. It didn’t look quite like I had imagined. There were no glaring problems. No deep-rooted sin issues. Yet I was extremely aware of my husbands’ shortcomings, and I wasn’t holding back on sharing my thoughts.

I was quick to point out sin and eager to share “observations” about how he could change or grow as a leader, all under the pretense of being his helpmeet. I […]

Gospel Focused Exhortations to Sexual Purity

From my last Sunday’s sermon on 1 Corinthians 6:12-20 Paul argues for their sexual purity in a surprising way. His gospel oriented approach starts with indicatives (indicators of what God has done) and then moves to imperatives (commands of what we are to do).

1. Articulating and Deconstructing the Lies. (vv. 12-13)
a. “All things are lawful” – Said by Corinthians to justify their sin. Often said by Christians as they are being tempted to sin. “God will forgive me.”
b. “Food for the stomach and the stomach for food.” – Also said by Corinthians to justify their sin. The underlying philosophy of the world today. In other words, sex is an appetite just like food. Sex is to be satisfied just like when I am thirsty or […]

The Negative Effects of Cohabitation – Continued

Once again, people are discovering that there are negative effects of cohabitating before you marry.
Cohabitation in the United States has increased by more than 1,500 percent in the past half century. In 1960, about 450,000 unmarried couples lived together. Now the number is more than 7.5 million.
The common belief?
In a nationwide survey conducted in 2001 by the National Marriage Project, then at Rutgers and now at the University of Virginia, nearly half of 20-somethings agreed with the statement, “You would only marry someone if he or she agreed to live together with you first, so that you could find out whether you really get along.” About two-thirds said they believed that moving in together before marriage was a good way to avoid divorce.
The truth?
But that belief is […]

Show Yourself a Man with Randy Stinson

New Covenant Christian Fellowship and The Apollos Project were excited to host Dr. Randy Stinson on March 23 and 24 2012. Dr. Stinson  is the Dean of the School of Church Ministries at Southern Seminary, the Executive Director of  The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, and author of A Guide to Biblical Manhood, Trained in the Fear of the Lord, and has edited Three Perspectives on Family Ministry

Topics Included:

Be Strong and Prove Yourself a Man: Defending and Cultivating Biblical Manhood

Session 1

What Does It Look Like for a Man to Lead in His Home?

Session 2

Raising Masculine Sons and Feminine Daughters

Session 3

Joint Heirs in the Grace of Life: Warnings to Men as They Lead

Session 4

You might also enjoy his message on adoption:

Sunday’s message

Submission Equals Amenability

Mary Kaissan was asked a number of questions about submission. You can read her whole article here.  But I thought the third question was particularly interesting.
What Does Submission Look Like?
Rachel’s third question was “How long have you been married, and how has submission worked out practically in your marriage? (In other words, what does it look like when you submit to your husband?)

My answer:
I’ve been married for 29 years-“just getting going” says my mom, who’s been married for 62.

“What it looks like” is a difficult question, since submission is not something foreign-not something “other”-to the character of a redeemed woman. Submission is not as much an “action” as it is an “attitude.” So it can’t be dictated by behavioral prescriptives. Submission boils down to a having […]

Five Ways to Encourage Your Husband

Good words on 5 ways a wife can encourage her husband. So much writing is for men by men. But when it comes to advising women, men speak more softly. And yet, your marriage will affect your children’s faith for good or for bad.

Your husband needs your encouragement. How?

1. Praise him verbally.
2. Submit to his leadership.
3. Reject relational legalism.
4. Take an interest in him.
5. Spend “time” with him.

Jared elaborates eloquently on each one. Read the whole thing. Your husband will thank you for it.


She’s Not Perfect But She’s Perfect for Me

My father-in-law has a profound little saying that sums up a Biblical attitude spouses should have to one another. The saying? “She’s not perfect but she’s perfect for me.

Let’s examine the two parts.

She’s not perfect. By making this statement, the spouse is communicating to himself that he married another sinner. Too many partners are biting and devouring each other because they demand perfection of the other. Many a wife has said, “I would have the perfect marriage if I had a more spiritual husband.” And many husbands are saying, “Why can’t my wife be more like this other woman?” In these unspoken thoughts is an unwillingness to accept the other person.  We cannot see the log in our own eyes but we can see clearly […]